Judgement.

I tend to stand in awe at how God takes the most regular situations and combines them to teach me lessons or remind me of lessons I should have actually learned long ago. Tonight was a bit of a double whammy in that regard. I've definitely been challenged lately by the sin of self-righteous judgement, especially in my own life considering the damage that I have seen others cause through it, including to myself. The question I must constantly challenge myself is whether I am using a difference of opinion as a weapon instead of as a point of prayerful growth. Unfortunately, I too often fail by settling for the former as it requires much less effort to attack, even behind someones back, than it does to pursue truth together. I found it very cool this evening how a large part of our conference's executive director's opening talk focussed on this every thing; the timing was perfect to what God has been challenging me hard on especially in the last few weeks. However, the double whammy was unexpected.

I was then reminded of a situation a number of years ago where an entire family was greatly hurt by the self-righteous judgemental actions of someone I was associated with, and it only just hit me as I was reflecting on the evening that by my complicity I was just as much to blame. I might not have been able to change the initial situations (although looking back I certainly did see the signs leading in that direction) but I could have had an affect on the aftermath. The problem was that as uncomfortable I felt with the situation as it unfolded, to address it would have opened myself up to the same judgement and some possible serious consequences. Basically, I was scared. 

It's important to emphasize that I'm not playing the guilt game here... If I was to do that I'd be in a whole lot more trouble. One of the greatest joys of forgiveness is simply known that you're forgiven! However, I do believe that it is also important to remember and so this is the challenge I am feeling right now. Not only am I commanded not to live in self-righteous judgement over others, but I am also commanded to do something if I see others doing so, especially in Christ's name. What does it mean to do something? I'm actually not entirely sure, besides the fact that it needs to be done with much prayer, but I do believe it involves being willing to act when God tells me to act. This might be as simple as sharing a verse of scripture He has put on my heart that speaks to the situation, or it may be as dangerous as challenging an authority figure who is abusing their authority. The main thing though is trusting in God instead of fearing man. It's something I'm learning a little more each day.

I don't know if any of this made sense.... it does to me anyway but that certainly doesn't mean much. However, it was on my heart to write and maybe that was for a reason....